WWE Raw Live Reactions: 10 June, 2019

Well, here we are again, folks. Another Monday, another Raw, another chance for WWE to completely destroy any hope I have in their writers. My name is Mick, and I’ve been a wrestling fan for most of my 33 years of life. Join me as I suffer my way through another episode of “Vince Changes Everything at the Last Minute!”

Lets get this underway, shall we?

We’re starting this week off the way it should always start – with the Champ. Rollins comes out, wielding his chair like a trophy, and I fully approve. I would also like to point out that I fully approve of his gear, which is an homage to the most recent Avengers movie. We’re now being subjected to a replay of Friday’s Super Showdown event (which, begrudgingly, was better than I expected it to be). As usual, he’s full of energy and I love it.

And here comes Baron, to ruin the moment. San Jose gives him a huge pop, full of boos and “you suck” chants, as expected. I’ll hand it to the man, he does a good job of keeping a straight face. He really needs some acting classes, though.

Now out comes Sami Zayn to interrupt Rollins cutting down Corbin…and takes Baron’s side. He’s got some great back and forth with Rollins, but that doesn’t surprise me. Rollins plays well off of just about everyone.

KO wants to join the party, now. Baron looks mighty pleased with himself to have all this support. Rollins challenges KO to a match tonight and storms up the ramp to get in all three of their faces. The three of them stand there dumbstruck, and now we have Lars Sullivan hopping around in Gorilla.

Out comes Lars and I can feel my dinner trying to come back up. He’s such a creep. Luckily, I have a commercial break to settle things down.

Back from break and we’re having a rematch of Friday’s match. Lucha House Party is in the ring and Lars, not unsurprisingly, takes them all by surprise. We’re doing an elimination match tonight, and Kalisto is out first. Lars makes quick work of Lince Dorado and now Gran Metalik is the last one left. Sullivan is just tossing them around like ragdolls now, regardless of who’s been eliminated. WWE really missed a huge opportunity with this guy. He should have been pitted against Strowman, or someone more his equal in size. Not this nonsense. It is what it is, though. Sullivan takes the win, to no one’s surprise.

We’re backstage with Truth and Carmella, once again running away from a horde of jobbers, who all want a shot at the #JOBSquad title. Truth somehow winds up in an elevator with Mella and some of the jobbers…and it appears they’re stuck, with the ref stuck outside the elevator.

On the way out to ads, we get shots of Lacey and Becky prepping for their interview. Lacey is primping, and Becky is chatting with her boyfriend.

We’re back and I’m kind of disappointed this isn’t face to face. Lacey tries to interrupt and start the interview but Becky cuts her off. This is actually kind of painful to watch, honestly. Lacey’s speech pattern drives me insane, and Becky isn’t saying anything we haven’t heard a million times already. Not a dig on the ladies, but it’s a huge dig on the writers. We need some new material.

Now we’re in the locker room with Alexa and Nikki, my favorite odd couple. Alexa trash talks Bayley and Nikki looks equal parts sympathetic and suspicious. I love these two, and I really can’t wait for this friendship to implode.

Quiet on the set! Miz is making his way to the ring, which means business is about to pick up. We’ll have a new episode of MizTV after the break, with special guest Samoa Joe.

Miz is in the ring, and he’s about to bring out Samoa Joe. Joe immediately interrupts Miz and we’re off. I really want this to be a lead-in to a feud between these two. Miz calls him out for going after Rey’s son. Joe says he does whatever he wants, nothing is going too far. Here’s the heat I was hoping for, and…it’s interrupted by Braun.

And not to be left out, here comes Lashley. I’m assuming this is going to turn into a Fatal Fourway. Lashley says he’s not done with Braun, and he has history with Joe…which means he deserves a shot at the US title.

But wait, there’s more! Ricochet comes out to put in his two cents, but Cesaro comes out and shuts him up. We’re in chaos now, and it looks like we’re getting a six man tag.

Right after these messages!

It’s Lashley, Cesaro, and Samoa Joe vs. Miz, Ricochet, and Braun. First up we’ve got Braun trucking his way through Lashley. Tag to Miz, who follows up on the momentum, until Joe knocks him on his face. This is such a weirdly thrown together match, and I’m a little salty I’m not getting Miz vs Joe buildup.

We’re going to break, and I’m going to put my screaming parrots to bed for the night.

The feathered raptors are tucked in for the night and we’re back to the six man tag. It’s Ricochet and Cesaro going at it now, but we get a tag to Lashley and now it’s his turn to manhandle Ricochet. Miz tags in and has the upperhand, but we know it won’t last. I’m fully expecting a face win for the match. Miz gets worked over by everyone on the heel side and tries to get help from Braun, but ends up in a swing with Cesaro. I would probably throw up if he ever did that to me.

Miz is in the sharpshooter but Ricochet breaks the hold. Braun climbs back onto the apron and screams for Miz to make the tag – and he gets it. Braun tankers through Cesaro, who is still wobbling all over from the swinging. He gets those hands, but Joe breaks up the count. Braun manages to get Joe on his shoulder by some ridiculous show of strength, but Joe wriggles out, runs for his title, and books it up the ramp.

All hell is breaking loose now, but Ricochet gets the pin. It looks like he may have dislocated Cesaro’s kneecap or torn something with that 630. The faces celebrate their win and now we’re in the back with Baron and Charlie. Sami interrupts to have a chat with Baron.

Becky Lynch is now on her way to the ring. When we come back from break, we’ll have a pointless women’s tag match.

Back from break and now it’s time for the ladies to run the show. Bayley comes out to huge cheers from her hometown crowd, followed by Alexa and her new friend Nikki. Lacey is last, catwalking her way to the ring. Becky looks like all she wants is to rip that woman limb from limb, and I’m not mad about it.

Bayley and Alexa start things off. Some back and forth and now Lacey is tagged in. Bayley backs her into the corner and now Becky is tagged in. Lets be real, we all know the point of this match is to hype Becky vs. Lacey at Stomping Ground. Everything else is just filler. Bayley gets a sloppy baseball slide to Lacey before we go to commercial. Again.

We’re back. Again. Not much has changed since we went to break. We’ve got Lacey and Becky in the ring, giving a little back and forth. I’ve pretty much lost interest in this match at this point. Seems like we’re getting sloppier the longer this match goes, which seems to be a theme with the women’s matches.

Lacey gets the win over Bayley, successfully ending this nightmare of a match. Nikki looks incredibly confused as Lacey and Alexa celebrate.

Oh look, Shane’s here. Shock. Sami pops in and has a chat with Shane. Looks like we’re getting Sami as the special “outside referee” for tonight’s main event. We all scratch our heads in confusion as we go to yet another commercial break.

We come back to the news that John Cena is joining the Fast Franchise. Which is just one more reason for me to not like the franchise.

Paul Heyman’s here, and he has something to say! I will never stop saying it: Heyman is probably the best guy on the mic these days. I don’t even care that he’s Lesnar’s mouth piece. He cuts another stellar promo, punctuating it with a mic drop, and waddles his way out.

It appears Mella and the JobSquad are still stuck in the elevator, and things are quickly breaking down.

Oh my lord, IIconics! They DO exist! It appears we’ll be having a tag match after the break.

Back from break with a Firefly Funhouse teaser, and then back to IIconics. These women irritate the hell out of me. They’ve “scoured the Earth” to find the best competition. Enter two local indy wrestlers. We get a dig at the San Jose Sharks, and the bell rings. This whole segment is a giant waste of time, as are these tag titles. I had so much more hope for a women’s tag division. Instead we get this mess.

Quick recap of Shane Vs. Roman on Friday, along with Roman’s post-match interview. The ring is being set up for ANOTHER Best in the World celebration on the way to break.

The #JOBSquad is still stuck in the elevator but things seem to have calmed down.

Here come Drew and Shane, for yet another wasted segment dedicated to Shane being the “Best in the World”. Drew is in clothes, which is disconcerting, and escorted by bagpipe players. I feel like he’s trying to twin with Shane tonight.

Shane is hyping Roman, which means he’s going to tear him down twice as bad at any second. Yep, there it is. Drew looks so pleased. The crowd is chanting, sounds like boring. I’m with you, San Jose. Drew is offended. Not gonna lie, I’m totally distracted by the champagne on the table. It’s making me want a mimosa.

Drew cuts another cookie cutter promo, that is pretty much the same exact promo he gives every week. Can we PLEASE get new writers, or put Vince in a home now?

Ah, we’re bringing The Revival out now. I keep forgetting the Uso’s are on Raw. We’ve got a triple threat for the tag titles coming up after the break.

Uso’s come out to the ring to join Revival and the Long Island boys get interviewed in the back before coming to the ring to defend their titles. I’m rooting for The Revival tonight, honestly.

Quick break and we’re back. The Uso’s are speeding things up a bit and now things are falling apart. Tags everywhere, some two-counts, and Ryder and Jimmy are the legal men. Jey Uso tags himself in and he’s cleaning house. Scott Dawson tags himself in and gets the pin! The Revival are your new tag champs!

We go to the back, where Charlie is interviewing Seth Rollins. He’s ready. He’s ready for everyone. Bring it on.

New Firefly Funhouse, right after these words from our sponsors!

The JOBSquad is still in the elevator, where Drake is stressing about his upcoming wedding. I hate this stupid title. Ah, the outside jobbers finally got the doors open, and the chaos ensues. Truth manages to take off in the elevator, thanks to Carmella. I still don’t know how those two became a team, but I ship it.

Firefly Funhouse time! I really don’t know how he’s going to beat last week, but I’m excited to find out.

Well…that happened.

Main event time! Rollins makes his way to the ring first, pumped up and ready for a fight…right after yet another break.

We’re back! KO makes his way out to meet Rollins in the ring. Sami comes out next in his zebra suit, doing his funky little dancing. I love this dork. This match is obviously stacked in favor of KO, but I’m sure Rollins will get the win, regardless.

The bell rings, and we’re off. Some decent back and forth to start and Rollins gets the first pin attempt. Of course he goes for another pin and Sami distracts the inside ref. Shocker. Rollins gets distracted by Sami before going after Kevin again. Sami causes yet another distraction and Kevin gets the upperhand as we go to our last break of the night.

Back from break and it appears KO has been dominating since we last saw them. Seth is bleeding, not quite sure how that happened. He starts to fight back, hitting Owens with a slingblade. It doesn’t last long, as Kevin hits an amazing high risk spot. We’ve got some great back and forth again and now it’s Seth’s turn to go up top. Of course Sami gets involved again.

Kevin goes for a cheap shot pin, but Rollins kicks out. Suicide dive that hits KO and Sami, stomps KO and pins him for the win – but Sami yanks the ref out of the ring. Rollins is pissed and mouthing off with Sami. He grabs at Sami, who calls for the bell. Which means he’s about to get his butt handed to him.

Seth goes after Sami, and here comes Baron to even the score. Looks like the blood is coming from a cut over Seth’s left eyebrow. Baron’s got a chair but Rollins gets a kick to the stomach and turns the chair on Sami. Seth looks like a madman. I kind of like it. He continues to beat down Sami as Baron looks on in terror.

And that’s all she wrote, folks! Make sure to follow me on twitter @MickMess912, and on wordpress, Mick with Opinions. Until next time!